How many times have you wanted to say something to your significant other about your sex life and just couldn't spit it out.
Well this is the year you are going to get what you want. Believe me I have been married for thirty years. I know about fabulous sex.
Yes our sex life has always been great and as we both get older it just gets better and better. In fact its amazing. So I thought why not try and help other couples.
Yes you too Can have an unbelievable sex life too. How you ask? Well you have to talk to each other. Yes I mean sit face to face and actually communicate, No texting, no e-mails. That's for after the talk. I will come back to that.
Ladies and Gents I am going to give you some great advice here. So listen up!
The first thing I want you to do is get on the internet as soon as you are done reading this. Buy yourself some new adult toys. Try http://www.Goodvibes.com ,this site also has great advice about sex.
Those toys you bought ten years ago at a fuckaware party are nothing like what they have today. Go right for the good stuff. I'm talking about a magic wand. No batteries either. You want good old fashioned electricity. You might want to get an extension cord too. I don't know why the makers of these wands don't make them with longer cords. The Magic wand didn't get its name because it does tricks, haha.
No it truly is magic, and it will become the one toy that you will no doubt say, "How did I ever do without it." Or if you are the man in this relationship the wand will be the gift that keeps on giving for the both of you.
Look around that adult website for other toys and things that you would be open to trying. Put some of them on your wish list.
Yes even adult toy stores have wish list.
Start thinking about what kind of sex life you want to have. Once you do that then you can start introducing new toys and such to your partner. Weather its massage oils nipple clamps or blindfolds, it's your sexlife and you decide what you add to your new toy chest. I would suggest the blindfold. It's a way for women to let go of their inhibitions.
Maybe you just want to go for it and get some nipple clamps. There is a section for what ever kink you are in too. Or want to try.
Next go to the lingerie store, men are visual human beings. Pick up some thigh highs and a lace pair of panties or something that's not going to break the bank. Get creative. You know what your spouse likes. It doesn't have to cost a lot to be sexy, Maybe its just a white tee shirt w/no panties, or a dress shirt and a pair of heels. Just don't go crazy with the perfume. A little goes a long way.
And guys if you buy your women some lingerie make sure you have her measurements with you. There is nothing worse than bringing home something beautiful and it not fitting her. And you can bet she is going to want be wearing it the first chance she gets. So be ready for her.
And for heavens sake do some manscaping down there. Women have to shave their legs and everything else so its the least you men can do. This is 2014 remember. You are both trying new things. Have some fun with it. Why not shave each other for starters. And when the time comes put on some cologne. Women like it when their man smells good. But again, not too much.
Use all the senses when you are having sex.
Ok now that all the preparation has been done and the toys are on there way. You have worked up some courage for some more communication. In order to have a great sex life you both have to talk to each other. What is you like? What is it she likes? What don't you like? Do you have a safe-word in place?
You Do you remember how to communicate right. You used to talk about everything. Maybe it was before you had kids. Maybe it was before your jobs became so stressful. No matter what it is, I promise its going to be alright.
Shut the TV off and look your spouse in the eyes and Go for it. "Babe, What can we do to spice up our sex life. I want to try new things. Can we talk about this?"
He/she is going to be shocked but happy. What man doesn't want to talk about sex. And what women doesn't want more attention. Go slow, and Breathe.
And just keep talking. Laughing is good too. You are in charge of this new sex life. If he wants to try something new look it up together.
Get some porn, there's actually some good porn out there with women in mind. I have watched these movies with my Sir. I don't think we've ever seen the end of one of them though, lol..
Ask your spouse what they think and go from there. Just tell your spouse that you want to start this new year out right. That you don't want to stay in the get laid once or twice a month club anymore.
You will have your spouses undivided attention and he/she will be curious. Of course he or she will also think you're cute while you are smiling like you have just come up with the best idea ever. You will see the wheels turning in his or her head. Just keep talking, and remember you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Set boundaries. And again put a safe-word in place, Red is always a good one. It means stop everything Now! Yellow would mean stop and talk about it. But red always means Stop!
Now as you wait for that package to come in the mail and you get your outfit ready for the night, start sending your spouse sexy text messages, and e-mails. This is dating in the new millennium. Just keep the lines of communication open. You might find some things out about your spouse that you never knew. Some you might like or love, and some you might say oh hell no. Just remember that its your sex life, and your rules.
I still read scenes or chapters from erotic romance books to my Sir. And sometimes I don't even get through a scene before he is taking me by the hand.
And when I am doing research for my books, Omg its great, I have made my Sir head of research and development. We do want to make sure the erotic sex is authentic, lol. I hope I have sparked your imagination in the kink department. Also if it's kink you are looking for then Fetlife or http://www.fetlife.com has every kind of kink you can think of.
Just do what makes you both feel good. Guys, take it slow, and listen to her. She will make sounds and it's up to you to listen to them.
Like I said I have been married to the same man for thirty years. And I have been through more then you can imagine. If I can have sex and keep my Sir happy than so can you.
Drop me an e-mail If you have a question. As long as you are comfortable with what each of you comes up with then its Ok. Sex is good for you relationship. And having good sex is the best way to keep your spouse happy.
I promise your spouse won't be able to get the pictures of you out of his or her head when you start on this new exciting journey together. Just go with it. Like I always say, Vanilla is fine but Kink is so much better. Enjoy yourselves..Have fun and laugh.